Some days I wish I never read this damn book.
There are some things that once you see, you can't un-see.
This book f***ed me up. (in a good way!)
...it propelled me into a way of life that has been both thrilling and terrifying and has taken me through the highest highs and to the lowest lows.
If you haven't read the book, it's the extraordinary account of one man's radical "surrender experiment."
Michael Singer realized at one point that life had a lot more to offer him than he had to take for himself and decided to surrender to life.
I'm sure you've heard of spiritual "surrender", but Michael took it to the extreme...
...As an example, at one point someone started building a house on his property without his consent...
...instead of calling the cops he simply grabbed his toolset and his work apron, went over to the job site, and said "Hey, I noticed you're building a house on my land, how can I help?"
That house ended up being part of an ashram which led to many beautiful things.
Without even intending it, as he adopted this lifestyle and ended up becoming a billionaire through falling in love with life.
It's one of the greatest stories of all time.
I read this book at the tail-end of 2019... and had one giant meltdown of a realization.
That realization was: I had no clue how to really live.
With all my adventuring, wild leaps of faith, and incredible feats of entrepreneurial courage I thought I knew how to live....
...Up until then, I was telling myself stories in my head where I saw myself as someone on the cutting edge of existence.
...but after reading this story, I realized I was fooling myself.
I thought I trusted life and myself, but as I looked inside all I found was a scared little boy clutching onto the last of dollars in his bank account thinking they provided him some imaginary safety and security.
I never fully let go... not until I read that book.
I remember the very moment it happened.
I was sitting at my desk contemplating my plans as the world appeared to be burning down before me.
I looked behind me and saw all my history and every piece of identity I was clutching onto, all my successes and failures, and how they had shaped who I thought I was.
I looked ahead of me and I saw the future that my mind was weaving for me... all the things I thought I "had" to do.
I noticed how this future had a lot to do with the feeling in my belly attached to the numbers in my bank account which dictated what was possible or not possible for me.
I started to rebel against that feeling
And the funny thing was...
...For the first time, I saw that that future had everything to do with perpetuating the guy who I thought I was.
...all my future plans and ideations were just iterations on the same old things I always did... and they were getting old.
It had very little to do with discovering who I really was and what I was really capable of.
The principles I interpreted from Michael's book were simple...
1. Whatever is happening is meant to be happening, go with it.
2. SURRENDER, do what your heart tells you, even if your mind tells you you're going to die, and trust.
It was nothing new to me... but his story made it go deeper into my bones.
So in one sweeping moment, I took a deep breath, and I JUST. F***NG. LET. GO.
It was cathartic and terrifying.
I took the last of my money and started a retreat company in the middle of 2020 when every airport was closed and no one was traveling.
Insane, but my heart said it was the right move, and it worked.
(It included building a make-shift retreat center almost from scratch in Mexico on a whim.)
That path took me traveling and flying all over doing some pretty wild things in the heart of the most difficult time on the planet and showed me a side of humanity I'll never forget.
When that chapter ended, I moved back home and did the next hardest thing I ever did: nothing.
I didn't want to do anything unless it was authentic and genuine.
I meditated for 2-3 hours every day sitting at home for months.
I cried the depths of my sorrows out night after night... because that's what was happening...
With every tear that rolled down my face, space inside of me opened up for something new.
Eventually the idea for "Sail the Stars" came into my field, and I initiated the project... a sailing voyage to inspire people to move past their blockages and turn wild visions into reality.
The project took some wild successful turns, money poured out of the sky, I ended up in Spain, and met a girl.
The project then took some unsuspected bad turns, I plunged into a full-on depression and chronic fatigue the likes of which I didn't experience before.
That led me to my mentor Dr. Kim D'Eramo, who healed my chronic fatigue, and depression and gave me the skills and abilities to do the transformational magic I do with people these days. (I now assist people in moving fear and depression in moments)
I flew back to Ecuador and rebuilt my life and business based on my new experience.
The girl and I broke up.
I met an incredible business mentor who completely revolutionized how I look at life and business.
That was one challenging and amazing year that came to an end as I decided to hike a mountain in the middle of a lightning-hail storm...
...coming home soaked, nearly avoiding a landslide I jumped into a cab and instead of going home grabbed a Pizza with a friend who came across my path...
...sitting soaked, smiling ear to ear with gratitude for life, the conversation over that pizza was life-changing and led me to pick up my sailing project again with an entirely more grounded plan.
I decided to leave Ecuador the following week and would have left except life had other plans.
I somehow tripped and fell in love with someone I shouldn't have, it was complicated, and it hurt a lot, but it opened my heart up to an entirely new level of love and possibilities.
Now I'm back in Spain, I've got my daughter nearby, I'm living in a wooden yurt taking care of three cats.
My life mission and message are clearer than ever, the first boat and voyage is waiting in Greece, and in 40 days I'll be a fulltime sailboat captain for a month making inspirational videos while adventuring with awesome people as we hop from one majestic island in Greece to another to connect with deep life vision and transmute our collective blocks.
The point in sharing all this?
Five years ago I was crying alone on a mountain-top without a clue of what to do with my life.
This week I'm buying some fins and a snorkel and practicing free-diving off the coast as much as possible by the Ocean so I can do some spear-fishing.
I didn't really plan for any of this.
Yet somehow I am exactly where I always wanted to be: alive, in my best shape and health ever, pushing my boundaries, living in nature, doing my best work, and discovering what's possible.
Sure, I had visions and goals, but I found the more I clutched onto "how" I thought they would transpire the more life ripped that "how" out of my hands and sent me curveballs.
The more I went with the curve-balls, the more they took me down the path I was meant to go, which ended up the more direct and scenic route anyway to exactly where I needed to be.
What I've learned from living this way for four and a half years is exactly this....
...Life truly has more to offer you than you can take for yourself, it's full to the brim.
You just have to let go, embrace the unknown, and surrender, and the path will be revealed.
Yes, some days I wish I had never read the book...
... but those are usually the days when the guy inside me who just wants to sit on a rocking chair and grow tomatoes takes over for a little bit.
Living a life of divine surrender isn't always easy.
Sometimes it means hiking up a mountain into a hail-filled lightning storm.
Sometimes it means getting your heart broken., and then using every ounce of your courage to love again.
It takes guts, grit, devotion, and the skills to be able to navigate
your own neurology to regulate your nervous system as you make massive upgrades and shifts in your life - it's not for the faint of heart.
However, in the end, it's worth it.
Kacper